Excellent essay, Jessica, and so true. It’s annoying and actually pretty awful that people always say to shut up and not talk about the big thing in the room. I hear it often. If we say hey this is a problem, people immediately have to look away. I like how you came right out and said the things we’re not supposed to say. Say it loudly and often.
Change always begins when One person starts to do something. We as a society are increasingly being convinced that we are not important enough to bring about the changes we want. They would not have to convince us of this if it were true. We are absolutely strong enough to bring about the changes we need that will improve our lives. We just need to stick together, support one another and do whatever small thing we can do to bring about those changes. When they should do something about that, changes to I should do something about that, you can guarantee that true change will happen. Thank you for your timely article that reminds us of our true power.
Anyone who says “let’s ignore this and it’ll go away” did not learn anything from saying “yeah it’s a good article as long as you don’t read the comments” circa 2015.
This essay hit like a Joan Baez song. Crisp, contemporary, timeless, and in tune. I find it delightful that you weren’t going to write today and then produced this smash hit. I think you’re an artist. And a prolific one at that. I love your work. Thank you for sharing it.
Btw, what is your preferred method of support? In other words, if I send a dollar your way, which channel puts the most directly in your pocket? I’ve sent a couple of contributions to the guide. I want to do right by you. Thanks for guidance.
Yes, you have stated the problem. Our culture has determined, by a magical default, that problems larger than us are best ignored and that people working with those problems are annoying troublemakers. That is a fatal flaw.
We are all overwhelmed by daily complexity, and several generations have grown up with it and an ever-worsening case of it. My approach, and I do this with my kids and grandkids (that are grownups and starting families (fear and trembling). They know what I think, but I don't beat anybody over the head with it. But when relevant, I update them. They know what is happening, but again, it is all too much, so they will ignore it if they can.
I have also taken to simply stating that we have, perhaps, ten or fifteen years before cultural collapse becomes real. We're seeing it now, and the reactive response to deny it is triggered very easily.
Some cultures, historically, have succeeded in responding to cataclysm by transforming themselves, while others have gone down without a fight. America seems unable to do more than sporadic demonstrations. An example that comes to mind is the Houthis, who have, totally illogically, defeated the US Navy.
This hit me as I have been in the camp that said - that doesn't matter we have to deal with this bigger issue. Palestine and Epstein were moments for me. When I received strange looks from friends when I pointed out the previous administration could have released Epstein files, prosecuted people, checked what was happening in Palestine. It was a moment. Now gerrymandering is another such crazy moment when I am being told to support gerrymandering because the other side did it first. Where does it end. Thank you for the reminder that issues of humanity do matter.
I think one of the most frustrating parts is that it would, in fact, be easier to address the problems earlier rather than waiting until they become too awful to ignore. So much easier to try, convict and imprison Trump BEFORE he became president again. So much easier to address the fact that COVID is an airborne disease and needs infrastructure changes in addition to vaccines before millions were infected with Long Covid. So much easier to solve things before they become big and widespread. So much easier to prevent than to cure. So frustrating!
The answer is to talk about whatever is important to you, attract those who agree with you on those issues, and to ignore critics unless they are people whose opinions you respect. Every great idea was opposed by bad faith criticism. Appeasing critics only emboldens them and diminishes yourself. You are correct that it is a pattern - it is the pattern of suppression. Do not live for the good opinion of others. Be the best person you can be and focus on the issues near and dear to your heart. Do be critical of yourself if you are not living up to your own standards. The rest, like myself, can be safely ignored.
I get so tired of the line, "Who cares what people think?" What other people think matters. We're social creatures, and all 8 billion of us are stuck on this planet together. What other people think matters, because their thoughts drive their actions, and their actions affect us, even if we wish they didn't. If I truly didn't care what people thought, then I wouldn't write at all.
The hideously ugly stuff that goes on every damned day matters. The asymmetries of treatment where none should exist matter. Moving ever towards a place where these things don't happen is a daily objective. And without that we devolve. (Oh, we do.)
But electoral politics is something else entirely.
In so much of life -- at least when we're being ambitious -- is trying to do things better. A search for the optimal. The realities of electoral politics in a two-party system (first past the post will tend to do that) mean that, at least the vast majority of the time, it's avoidance of the pessimal.
They're two separate activities that we quite naturally tend to conflate. And we'e got to do both, All the damned time.
This is ultimately reinforcing the status quo, and the status quo continues to exist because people are constantly upholding and reinforcing it. But the status quo is destroying this planet, and killing millions, while people continue to insist there is no other way, and constantly rejecting any alternative, which is exactly what I talk about at the end of the essay.
I wasn't even talking about electoral politics. Many of the solutions I'm talking about exist beyond the realm of electorial politics, even if they overlap, and people still won't do them.
I wonder if you've ever considered how much *your actions* contribute to the status quo, when you devote your energy to leaving comments like this and trying to explain the world as it is, rather than trying to change it.
I don’t disagree with you. I don’t disagree with you at all. Yes, the status quo has been a consistent problem, no matter who’s been in office (with occasional brighter moments; but only moments). But that’s how things are built.
Rewriting the rules? Great, if it can be done. But that’s either borne out of the death of empires, in which about half of the results end up positive, or revolutions, which usually end up putting a lot of the worst possible people in charge.
Excellent essay, Jessica, and so true. It’s annoying and actually pretty awful that people always say to shut up and not talk about the big thing in the room. I hear it often. If we say hey this is a problem, people immediately have to look away. I like how you came right out and said the things we’re not supposed to say. Say it loudly and often.
Yep, I wasn't planning to write anything today, but this one came bursting out. Thanks for reading!
Off topic, but I ordered my hardcopy of the manual yesterday. 😉
I hope it meets your expectations!
Change always begins when One person starts to do something. We as a society are increasingly being convinced that we are not important enough to bring about the changes we want. They would not have to convince us of this if it were true. We are absolutely strong enough to bring about the changes we need that will improve our lives. We just need to stick together, support one another and do whatever small thing we can do to bring about those changes. When they should do something about that, changes to I should do something about that, you can guarantee that true change will happen. Thank you for your timely article that reminds us of our true power.
Good essay. Thank you.
Anyone who says “let’s ignore this and it’ll go away” did not learn anything from saying “yeah it’s a good article as long as you don’t read the comments” circa 2015.
They're either playing ostrich, hoping it will just go away, or it's the old "Calm down, you're making a mountain out of a mole hill." shtick.
And those among us that see what's really going on are thinking: "Yeah? Mount Vesuvius started out as a mole hill and look what happened to Pompeii."
This essay hit like a Joan Baez song. Crisp, contemporary, timeless, and in tune. I find it delightful that you weren’t going to write today and then produced this smash hit. I think you’re an artist. And a prolific one at that. I love your work. Thank you for sharing it.
Btw, what is your preferred method of support? In other words, if I send a dollar your way, which channel puts the most directly in your pocket? I’ve sent a couple of contributions to the guide. I want to do right by you. Thanks for guidance.
Yes, you have stated the problem. Our culture has determined, by a magical default, that problems larger than us are best ignored and that people working with those problems are annoying troublemakers. That is a fatal flaw.
We are all overwhelmed by daily complexity, and several generations have grown up with it and an ever-worsening case of it. My approach, and I do this with my kids and grandkids (that are grownups and starting families (fear and trembling). They know what I think, but I don't beat anybody over the head with it. But when relevant, I update them. They know what is happening, but again, it is all too much, so they will ignore it if they can.
I have also taken to simply stating that we have, perhaps, ten or fifteen years before cultural collapse becomes real. We're seeing it now, and the reactive response to deny it is triggered very easily.
Some cultures, historically, have succeeded in responding to cataclysm by transforming themselves, while others have gone down without a fight. America seems unable to do more than sporadic demonstrations. An example that comes to mind is the Houthis, who have, totally illogically, defeated the US Navy.
This hit me as I have been in the camp that said - that doesn't matter we have to deal with this bigger issue. Palestine and Epstein were moments for me. When I received strange looks from friends when I pointed out the previous administration could have released Epstein files, prosecuted people, checked what was happening in Palestine. It was a moment. Now gerrymandering is another such crazy moment when I am being told to support gerrymandering because the other side did it first. Where does it end. Thank you for the reminder that issues of humanity do matter.
I think one of the most frustrating parts is that it would, in fact, be easier to address the problems earlier rather than waiting until they become too awful to ignore. So much easier to try, convict and imprison Trump BEFORE he became president again. So much easier to address the fact that COVID is an airborne disease and needs infrastructure changes in addition to vaccines before millions were infected with Long Covid. So much easier to solve things before they become big and widespread. So much easier to prevent than to cure. So frustrating!
The answer is to talk about whatever is important to you, attract those who agree with you on those issues, and to ignore critics unless they are people whose opinions you respect. Every great idea was opposed by bad faith criticism. Appeasing critics only emboldens them and diminishes yourself. You are correct that it is a pattern - it is the pattern of suppression. Do not live for the good opinion of others. Be the best person you can be and focus on the issues near and dear to your heart. Do be critical of yourself if you are not living up to your own standards. The rest, like myself, can be safely ignored.
Who cares what people think matters? Write what’s important for you.
If someone doesn’t like it, then it wasn’t for them.
I get so tired of the line, "Who cares what people think?" What other people think matters. We're social creatures, and all 8 billion of us are stuck on this planet together. What other people think matters, because their thoughts drive their actions, and their actions affect us, even if we wish they didn't. If I truly didn't care what people thought, then I wouldn't write at all.
I hear you. I didn’t express myself very well. Sorry.
I was really suggesting trust — that your audience would find you if you write what you liked.
That’s all.
Yes, dammit, it matters.
It all matters.
The hideously ugly stuff that goes on every damned day matters. The asymmetries of treatment where none should exist matter. Moving ever towards a place where these things don't happen is a daily objective. And without that we devolve. (Oh, we do.)
But electoral politics is something else entirely.
In so much of life -- at least when we're being ambitious -- is trying to do things better. A search for the optimal. The realities of electoral politics in a two-party system (first past the post will tend to do that) mean that, at least the vast majority of the time, it's avoidance of the pessimal.
They're two separate activities that we quite naturally tend to conflate. And we'e got to do both, All the damned time.
This is ultimately reinforcing the status quo, and the status quo continues to exist because people are constantly upholding and reinforcing it. But the status quo is destroying this planet, and killing millions, while people continue to insist there is no other way, and constantly rejecting any alternative, which is exactly what I talk about at the end of the essay.
I wasn't even talking about electoral politics. Many of the solutions I'm talking about exist beyond the realm of electorial politics, even if they overlap, and people still won't do them.
I wonder if you've ever considered how much *your actions* contribute to the status quo, when you devote your energy to leaving comments like this and trying to explain the world as it is, rather than trying to change it.
I don’t disagree with you. I don’t disagree with you at all. Yes, the status quo has been a consistent problem, no matter who’s been in office (with occasional brighter moments; but only moments). But that’s how things are built.
Rewriting the rules? Great, if it can be done. But that’s either borne out of the death of empires, in which about half of the results end up positive, or revolutions, which usually end up putting a lot of the worst possible people in charge.
But I could certainly be wrong.