By Huxley you are talented, Jessica, in so many ways: a clear thinker, a brave thinker, an incredible writer, and AFAICT an appropriately empathetic individual.
You know what’s coming, you know you are among as one of the privileged few who has a chance to prepare in meaningful (though hardly guaranteed) ways, you share that knowledge rather than hoarding it to eliminate potential competitors post-collapse, and you care about yourself both physically (by preparing material goods & circumstances as best you can) and mentally (by offering valuable advice to others, and reminding yourself of the limitations of full, real empathy). 🙏
A couple thoughts, and an invitation to enjoy something I believe is very relevant:
1. “Look around, and you’ll find no shortage of Americans who think they’re demonstrating empathy when they won’t even offer an unpopular opinion or wear a piece of cloth to stop spreading disease.”
And 🇨🇦 etc. as well, and selfishly self-destructive anti-vaxxers too. It’s infuriating to me that our scarce healthcare resources are wasted on treating preventable (and many once-eradicated) conditions, thereby depriving others in need.
All because of vanity, misinformation, “philosophical” & religious reasons (read: I can’t be assed/I’m selfish/someone has told me that an unevidenced deity will take care of it anyway), or laziness.
A pox on all & only *their* houses — if only it would stay contained to each of them, of course.
2. “This runs the risk of compelling the people in question into victimhood and removing their agency. They’re not supposed to help themselves, and only an approved hero with the right status can intervene. That kind of empathy does a lot of damage.”
It also drives the appropriation of persecution/oppression by those who know full well that they are not victims, just to get a sweet slice of that support (read: attention & grift $$$).
3. On a more positive (or at least, more artistic & wise) note … the brilliant 🇨🇦 musician @joelplaskett has a beautiful song titled “Non-Believer” which speaks to this topic with optimism (and also realism):
This is a wonderful though not reassuring piece. 😉 It reminded me of an experience in my mid 20’s where a professor asked me if I had profited from racism. I was so uncomfortable. I didn’t know how to respond so I said nothing. The answer was and is yes. Am I comfortable with this fact?! Of course not, but it’s a fact.
The problem of “empathy” reminds me of the problem with my not being able to recognize my racism for fear of being labeled a “bad person”. As you point out the focus should be on justice not feelings, because my not wanting to feel bad made me want to run away from that conversation decades ago. I think this drives a lot of peoples behavior. They want to be seen as a “good person” so they work very hard to stay away from discomfort that might lead to a more just world.
It's not hard for some of us to be a good person, but it's often thankless and not very pleasant--and I agree that's where a lot of people get tripped up. It's a lot easier and feels a lot better (in a temporary sense) to pretend to be a good person.
"Fritz Breithaupt calls all this “filtered empathy.” Basically, the book or film (or neatly packaged consumer product) doesn’t promote direct empathy for the main targets of abuse. Instead, they promote empathy for heroes, saviors, and observers. This runs the risk of compelling the people in question into victimhood and removing their agency. They’re not supposed to help themselves, and only an approved hero with the right status can intervene. That kind of empathy does a lot of damage."
This immediately made me think of how much coverage was given to aid workers in Gaza, especially those from the World Central Kitchen, murdered by the IDF. Yes, their murders were horrible, but outpouring of empathy over their murders dwarfed that typically shown for the Palestinians in general. Very interesting, and sad, phenomenon.
We, the 20, write and talk, and echo, and propagate, and explain, and hope for the best; And then, in an awareness of younger, and earlier times, we can realize that we have all been here before....we have all been here before...maybe time seems short- no worries-
I am in a bunch of subs on reddit, narcissistic abuse (i filed for divorce), collapse, economic collapse, long covid, zero covid, xx preppers, etc.
I regularly get in discussions with people about our “now” fascist america. And how terrible things are today. Yes, they are terrible, but for Black Americans, Native Americans, Native Hawaiians, America has always been fascist and terrible. People chose to not see what they didn’t want to see. They chose not to see Native Americans dying from covid at 5 times white people. Chose not to see the continuing police state. Chose not to see America sending German Shepherd to attack children. Spraying children with water hoses….
America never has had empathy. Narcissists have none.
By Huxley you are talented, Jessica, in so many ways: a clear thinker, a brave thinker, an incredible writer, and AFAICT an appropriately empathetic individual.
You know what’s coming, you know you are among as one of the privileged few who has a chance to prepare in meaningful (though hardly guaranteed) ways, you share that knowledge rather than hoarding it to eliminate potential competitors post-collapse, and you care about yourself both physically (by preparing material goods & circumstances as best you can) and mentally (by offering valuable advice to others, and reminding yourself of the limitations of full, real empathy). 🙏
A couple thoughts, and an invitation to enjoy something I believe is very relevant:
1. “Look around, and you’ll find no shortage of Americans who think they’re demonstrating empathy when they won’t even offer an unpopular opinion or wear a piece of cloth to stop spreading disease.”
And 🇨🇦 etc. as well, and selfishly self-destructive anti-vaxxers too. It’s infuriating to me that our scarce healthcare resources are wasted on treating preventable (and many once-eradicated) conditions, thereby depriving others in need.
All because of vanity, misinformation, “philosophical” & religious reasons (read: I can’t be assed/I’m selfish/someone has told me that an unevidenced deity will take care of it anyway), or laziness.
A pox on all & only *their* houses — if only it would stay contained to each of them, of course.
2. “This runs the risk of compelling the people in question into victimhood and removing their agency. They’re not supposed to help themselves, and only an approved hero with the right status can intervene. That kind of empathy does a lot of damage.”
It also drives the appropriation of persecution/oppression by those who know full well that they are not victims, just to get a sweet slice of that support (read: attention & grift $$$).
3. On a more positive (or at least, more artistic & wise) note … the brilliant 🇨🇦 musician @joelplaskett has a beautiful song titled “Non-Believer” which speaks to this topic with optimism (and also realism):
https://youtu.be/odY9smnPyAA
I don't believe there is a plan
Feels too much like an accident
I stumble blindly into your life
This non-believer
…
My dad said, "Son, there's nothing else
Before you love someone you gotta learn to love yourself
Know when they're gone they will be truly be gone
So don't you waste your time"
…
It's buried deep but I suspect
There is something here to resurrect
People collide, buildings collapse
Gotta try again
I don't believe there is a plan
Feels too much like an accident
***
Be well, friends, and take care of yourselves so that you can take care of others too 🙏
💪💪🇨🇦
Well said. Between anti-vaxxers and vanity nonprofits who absorb resources in the name of humanitarian aid, we have enough diversions.
This is a wonderful though not reassuring piece. 😉 It reminded me of an experience in my mid 20’s where a professor asked me if I had profited from racism. I was so uncomfortable. I didn’t know how to respond so I said nothing. The answer was and is yes. Am I comfortable with this fact?! Of course not, but it’s a fact.
The problem of “empathy” reminds me of the problem with my not being able to recognize my racism for fear of being labeled a “bad person”. As you point out the focus should be on justice not feelings, because my not wanting to feel bad made me want to run away from that conversation decades ago. I think this drives a lot of peoples behavior. They want to be seen as a “good person” so they work very hard to stay away from discomfort that might lead to a more just world.
It's not hard for some of us to be a good person, but it's often thankless and not very pleasant--and I agree that's where a lot of people get tripped up. It's a lot easier and feels a lot better (in a temporary sense) to pretend to be a good person.
Another excellent piece, Jessica!
Regarding this bit:
"Fritz Breithaupt calls all this “filtered empathy.” Basically, the book or film (or neatly packaged consumer product) doesn’t promote direct empathy for the main targets of abuse. Instead, they promote empathy for heroes, saviors, and observers. This runs the risk of compelling the people in question into victimhood and removing their agency. They’re not supposed to help themselves, and only an approved hero with the right status can intervene. That kind of empathy does a lot of damage."
This immediately made me think of how much coverage was given to aid workers in Gaza, especially those from the World Central Kitchen, murdered by the IDF. Yes, their murders were horrible, but outpouring of empathy over their murders dwarfed that typically shown for the Palestinians in general. Very interesting, and sad, phenomenon.
think you so much for your article today and every time you educate us to 'wake up and build community.
We, the 20, write and talk, and echo, and propagate, and explain, and hope for the best; And then, in an awareness of younger, and earlier times, we can realize that we have all been here before....we have all been here before...maybe time seems short- no worries-
I am in a bunch of subs on reddit, narcissistic abuse (i filed for divorce), collapse, economic collapse, long covid, zero covid, xx preppers, etc.
I regularly get in discussions with people about our “now” fascist america. And how terrible things are today. Yes, they are terrible, but for Black Americans, Native Americans, Native Hawaiians, America has always been fascist and terrible. People chose to not see what they didn’t want to see. They chose not to see Native Americans dying from covid at 5 times white people. Chose not to see the continuing police state. Chose not to see America sending German Shepherd to attack children. Spraying children with water hoses….
America never has had empathy. Narcissists have none.
It doesn’t.
Our primitive brains cannot comprehend